Page 49 - Phonebox Magazine June 2006

Phonebox Magazine 49
Society Today by Geoff Baccus
Society today is in a terrible mess, we all know it is but we are not all agreed on the changes we want, nor even on how we believe things might be improved. I’ve moved into expressing myself firmly on some of our problems and failures. I am only one person, one mind, one set of beliefs. You have your own beliefs and may well disagree betimes with me. It is in everyone’s interests that both sides of the coin shall be seen. You have my e-mail address with these commentaries, please let me hear from you or send direct to the Phonebox Magazine. It will be good to see other opinions in print. Whereas most of what I wrote in these pages last month was well received my favourite collaborator gave me a roasting over my expressed enthusiasm for corporal punishment. And it was well deserved for I was mixing little children with young adult thugs.
Corporal punishment, subject to proper controls, seems a legitimate means of control and direction within the secondary school environment. (I’ll be roasted again!), but among younger children it must be a purely family matter; but here again there is a difference between the legitimate and the mere application of brute strength.
My first diatribe was brought on by a group of young ‘adults’ (19 going on 7) whose idea of amusement comprises the wilful destruction of simple public facilities, a bus shelter, tennis courts, playground equipment set for the pleasure of little tots. These young people are of an age where crime is crime, these young people are scoffing at the rest of us because they know the legal process offers nothing more severe than an ASBO. The rest of us are sick of the results we see and we are exasperated by a pattern of law which no longer expresses society’s wish for simple decent standards of personal conduct. I have every sympathy with the group of people who choose to take matters in hand on a local basis close to the time of the offence. The expression I used in the previous issue was ‘a damn good thrashing’. I am opposed to gratuitous injurious violence even on such an occasion. If only parliament might alter the law and kick social services into touch we might all have the pleasure of more peaceable lives. A few weeks of lost liberty (yes prison) might pull some of these thugs up with a jerk and have them think to join the rest of us in enjoying what we have around our daily lives.
Another group of young ‘adults’ are people (usually female) who pretend to parenthood. Oh how I despise the young woman who shouts obscenities down a shopping aisle at her small child. She sees the little one only as an encumbrance to her pleasure, indeed the poor little person probably only came into this world as a ‘career move’ into a three bedroom council house. Shopping aisles are great examination halls for parenthood. The happy child is only too delighted to stay close to Mum living under an umbrella of love, that child accepts that the answer by the sweet counter may be ‘no’, but knows full well that Mum has some pleasing little secret in mind and will wait to get home. If on the other hand you are just three and can expect only an unmerciful slapping and a deal of ignorant cussing and swearing then you may as well wander off and hope for better or even a smile at the other end of the aisle.
The vast majority of today’s social failures are the children of an altogether more reprehensible group. We need legal means to lay the blame firmly on the parents (if traceable) of our yobs. Far too often this in turns comes back to social services as things now stand; but this is itself a failure of law, our law removes the child rather than correct the parent who therefore gets off scot free. ‘Mother’ simply moves on to another boy friend and another fun run to the Costa del wherever and gives birth to another problem.
There are people who seek to offer young children and orphans a more ambitious future than is served by the politically correct methods of social services. We have one wonderful group in our own part of the world and I am happy to canvass your support for them. The St Francis Childrens’ Society place young children within homes where the warmth of love abides, and where sensible guidance into life is assured. Although they are an RC organisation they certainly do not make sectarian assessments when serving a child’s needs.
I’ll make you an offer! From time to time I’m asked for copies of photographs which I provide for this magazine. If you want any of my pictures then send me an e-mail with description of the required picture (even an ‘oldie’ may still be in my archives) and I’ll send it as an attachment to the reply. In return I will only ask you to drop into the Phonebox office by the Co-op and put a purely voluntary £1 or two into the little St Francis box on the counter. e-mail geoff.bacchus@btopenworld.com d
St Francis’ Children’s Society
With Fathers day approaching, Katherine & Mark reflect on the journey that brought them and their two children Peter & James now aged 8 and 6 together as a family.
We had tried unsuccessfully for our own family for a number of years and we felt the natural progression for us to have a family was adoption. We then took the next step and decide to contact an agency. This was to start exploring the possibility that we could be adoptive parents.
We contacted St Francis children’s society in Milton Keynes. We were interested in working with St Francis as we saw them as a small and approachable organisation with many years of experience in the field of adoption. They were very helpful when we telephoned and were invited to an initial meeting where they explained the support that they offered through initial assessment, explaining how children were placed with approved families and the post adoption support that they could offer. We were put very much as ease and felt that we could work with them.
In the coming weeks a social worker was assigned to us who would complete our assessment and dates were set for us to attend a series of preparation meetings. This involved a series of discussions with our social worker at our house and these were supported by group meetings with other prospective adopters. We found the process very informative and it helped us to explore the issues surrounding adoption.
Once we were approved we then worked with our social worker in finding a family. We expressed interest in two boys aged threre years and 18 months and were successfully matched with them. The boys were placed with us about one year after the initial telephone call to the agency. The years that we have been together as a family have been great and whilst not without their up’s and down’s, we wouldn’t be without the children. We have had times when we have needed to refer back to St Francis for advice and support which was readily given.
St Francis children society also organise lots of event for all age groups which include family days, picnics, a young persons group, were adoptive families can come together. The boys love attending these events and it helps us all to meet other people and children in similar situations. The last five years have been
pretty hectic and certainly kept us on our toes but they have also been a lot of fun. e
If you are interested or would like to know more about adoption then why not take a look at our website at www.sfcs.org.uk or call and speak to the Duty Social Worker on 01908 572700.
We look forward to hearing from you.